Joanna Gaines is looking back on her journey to embracing her Korean heritage

• The Fixer Upper actress was raised in Rose Hill, Kansas, a small town outside of Wichita, with her two sisters, Teresa and Mary Kay, also known as Mary and Kay.
• Teresa and Mary Kay met while Jerry was serving in the U.S. military stationed in South Korea. “
• Gaines, 44, recalls her early years in this week’s news article, saying, “We were literally the only Asians in our entire school.”

 The Fixer Upper actress was raised in Rose Hill, Kansas, a small town outside of Wichita, with her two sisters, Teresa and Mary Kay, also known as Mary and Kay. Teresa and Mary Kay met while Jerry was serving in the U.S. military stationed in South Korea. “Mikey.”

Gaines, 44, recalls her early years in this week’s news article, saying, “We were literally the only Asians in our entire school.”

Gaines recalls being called names and made fun of as a student for eating rice for lunch in the cafeteria.

“It was deeply personal because that was half of my story,” she shares. “I realized if this isn’t accepted, maybe I need to hide it and play more into the other side of who I am.”

Gaines writes that looking back, “Many of the things from my early memories that come to mind are the times when I shut down and thought, “Oh, I can’t be this,” “I shouldn’t be this,” or “This won’t be approved.” I won’t, for example, receive the kind of affirmation that kids crave.”

“I just internally processed all by myself, which as a kid, we all know isn’t healthy because what you end up doing is just shoving it somewhere,” she continues. “It ends up coming out at some point because we have to deal with it. So for me, sadly, it took years for me to wrestle with that.”

She didn’t start developing a completely different viewpoint until she moved from her little community to do a college internship in New York City.

“I saw more people that looked like me than ever before,” she says. “I left really understanding the beauty and uniqueness of Korean culture and for the first time I felt whole like this is fully who I am and I’m proud of it.”

Gaines had to deal with the ingrained insecurities she had been repressing for years, though.

“There were a lot of things I believed that wasn’t true,” she explains. “I had to go back and cross those out and say, ‘This is the truth. You are worthy. You are enough.’ My biggest regret is not owning it earlier and really loving who I am.”

In her debut solo biography, The Stories We Tell, which will be released on November 8, the Magnolia Network actress discusses the procedure for eradicating such lies.

“I had to actually go back and say, ‘This is the lie I believed for 21 years, and now I have to rewrite that,'” Gaines shares. “When we really take hold of our story and write it down, there’s so much healing that can come from that.”

She now feels more purposeful as a result of that approach.

“When I finished the book, I looked up and I just remember thinking, if I wouldn’t have done that, I wouldn’t hold what I’m holding now, which is empathy, perspective, and clarity,” she says.

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