After a joke leads to a three-way family, the husband, wife, and girlfriend become throuples

While Tom admits that the dynamics between the three are different, he maintains that the relationship functions in a traditional manner.

He and Lesley went out of their way to make Emma feel welcome and a part of the throuple.

“We understood that it could be difficult because Lesley and I had been together for so long, and that we would naturally be much closer than we would be with Em,” Tom says.

“We did everything we could to make sure she didn’t feel left out.” I adore Emma.

“We recognise that the dynamics are distinct. We find a happy medium where we can all work on our relationship at the same time.”

Although there was bound to be some jealousy early on, the throuple dealt with every issue as soon as it arose to avoid resentment or problems later on.

“The first-line communication wasn’t great,” Emma continues.

“But I believe it was due to my self-esteem and confidence. I didn’t believe in myself.

“I didn’t believe I was capable. But they’ve been so encouraging and reassuring that I’ve realised that communication is the most important thing.”

Lesley, a senior financial administrator who also sells artwork on the side, agrees with Emma – and adds that honesty is also important.

“It’s just like any other relationship,” she adds. Communication is essential. We don’t have many disagreements, just minor squabbles. I believe we have fewer disagreements than others.”

The trio has spoken openly to family and friends, claiming that they have never encountered any negativity – though some relatives were understandably taken aback.

“It was scary telling our friends and family,” Lesley admits, “but they have all been very welcoming.” It took some time to get used to.

“In fact, we’ve never had a problem. We kept it a secret at first, just in case it didn’t work out.

“However, our friends are becoming more open to that world. They’ve realised that there’s a lot more to life than just the two of them. Tom, on the other hand, devours it.

“Last year, there was a stag do. Every single male there said, ‘Go on, son.’ He loves it.”

Emma, who works as a team leader in a nursing home, adds, “My sister was completely fine with it from the start.”

“It took a while for my parents to understand because they didn’t really get it. My mother attempted to educate herself through polyamory, and she is now brilliant.”

It can be difficult to explain the relationship without people assuming, incorrectly, that they are up for anything.

“Me and Tom were at Pride and were invited to join some guys in a dungeon!” Lesley explains.

However, the throuple say they enjoy a traditional sex life, with ebbs and flows and days when everyone is content just to cuddle.

“It could be all three of us, just two – it could be anything,” Lesley says.

“I believe that sex with women and sex with men are vastly different. I’m a middle-of-the-road bisexual. It’s a mix of the two. It works very differently when all three of us are present.”

Lesley sleeps in the middle, while Emma prefers the side closest to the window. “I’m a light sleeper, so I have earbuds and a sleep mask,” she says.

Despite agreeing to exclusivity among the three of them, Tom says he is still free to “explore” things with other men if he so desires.

“If I want to explore with a man, I can do so as long as I keep communication open and let them know,” he says. But when it comes to women, it’s a one-sided deal.

“I think it’s the same with men; neither of them wants to explore with other men.”

There are also financial advantages to a three-way relationship, with Tom, Emma, and Lesley splitting the bills three ways.

Chores are also much easier, with everyone pitching in around the house.

A three-way relationship has financial benefits as well, with Tom, Emma, and Lesley splitting the bills three ways.

Chores are also much easier to complete when everyone pitches in around the house.